We've all had that friend
who disappears for a month, only to emerge newly coupled and minus ten pounds.
Or the friend who gets hitched and then develops a belly. What appears to be an
individual phenomenon is actually deep seated in our social and psychological
behavior. Food and love are inexorably linked, thanks to a complex hormonal
reaction that affects our emotional attachments to loved ones -- and our need
for food.
Notably, early in the
relationship, eating takes on weighted significance, according to Maryanne
Fisher, a professor of psychology St. Mary's University in Halifax, Nova
Scotia, whose research focuses on the evolutionary basis of romantic behavior.
"Food is a way to display skills to a potential mate," Fisher told
HuffPost Healthy Living. "You might buy nicer food, prepare better meals.
It's fascinating how it can be used as part of the relationship."
If the food is a display
-- say, if one partner cooks food for another, or one buys a fancy dinner for
the other -- that's preferable, because those who are newly in love tend not to
eat much. As Fisher noted in her essay on the subject, those who are newly
infatuated produce an overabundance of "reward hormones" like
norepinephrine. Those in turn produce feelings of euphoria, giddiness and
energy. But they also suppress appetite in many, according to Fisher.
But as with all things,
"love hormones" that go up must come down, and, in extreme cases,
that can lead to obesity. One 2008 University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill
study found that women who were married were twice as likely to become obese as
their peers who were single. Those who were cohabiting, but not married, were
63 percent more likely to become obese than single women. Men didn't emerge
unscathed: married men were also twice as likely to grow obese, though
cohabiting men were no more likely to be obese than their single counterparts.
For one thing, weight gain
includes an element of social contagion. If one spouse has poor eating habits,
such as a lack of portion control or a preference for unhealthy foods, that may
extend to the other spouse. And, as nutritionist Joy Bauer explained during a
segment on TODAY about the subject, there is little motivation to stay away
from the cozy snacking:
Most importantly, if
you’ve settled down with someone, you’re no longer facing the competition of
the dating field. That means you may have less incentive to stay in shape and
look your best. Plus, your lifestyle starts to revolve around food a bit more.
As a couple, you probably stay in and cozy up (with food) on the couch more
often than you did when you were single.
